Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
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