i just google imaged poop.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
