? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize
