Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Randomize
