I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
