alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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