Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
