oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
