Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
