I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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