similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Randomize
