What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
