He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize