we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Randomize
