Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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