HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
