You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
The adults are the big ones right?
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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