he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize