Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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