Me too!
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
