she woke up with a sticky ear
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Randomize
