Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
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