I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
