I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
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