I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
