its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Randomize
