i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Randomize
