Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Randomize
