I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
