btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
Panties = found
Randomize