smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
