you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
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