why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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