dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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