I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Randomize
