there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
