guys are not supposed to queef...right?
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
