he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
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