It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
