with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
Randomize