it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
Randomize
