Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
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