So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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