i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
I am available for nakedness
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Randomize
