Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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