I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
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