forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
Randomize
