If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
