Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
where does the pee come out of this thing
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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