Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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