gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Randomize
