My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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